Is Taking a Shower at Night Bad?

 Taking a shower is a perfect way to let your body relax. After a long day at work, your body and mind both need an easy getaway from fatigue and grim to refreshment. Showering at night will help you get back your high spirits and endurance. There is a lot of confusion over the facts on taking a shower at night. Some people think it is harmful to the body while some feel it may lead to illness and diseases. So, is bathing at night bad? The answer is 'NO', it is not a bad or harmful practice. There is also no scientific proof that showering at night is harmful for the body.

Benefits
Following are some of the benefits of taking a shower at night:

Taking a warm shower will cleanse your skin. It will flush out toxins from your skin, making you feel fresh and clean, leaving you with a soft and supple feeling at the end of the day.

Showering at night will help in lowering blood pressure, relieving you from all the stress. It will relax your body, giving you a power break from your busy routine.

After a rigorous day, even after you workout, your body muscles can feel tense and cramped. A shower will relax these muscles, and soothe body ache.

A warm shower will leave your skin feeling soft and smooth, and you will feel younger and fresher once you step out of the bath.

You will get sometime to relax, be yourself, and let all your worries take a back seat.

Apart from feeling fresh and relaxed, showering at night will also leave you smelling fabulous. Sinking in the bed with a soft and clean fragrance is pure bliss.

Most importantly, it will give you a deep and good sleep for the night. Taking a shower at night is also helpful in treating insomnia.

Taking a bath will allow you to unwind, physically and mentally. You wouldn't want to sleep with all that dirt and sweat on your bed at night. Go for a relaxing shower, continue this for a few days, and you will gradually notice the change.

Tips
We need to take care of certain things while showering at night. Following are a few tips that you can easily remember:

While taking a hair shower, make sure you have a warm water shower. Dry your hair properly before going to bed as during the night, the body temperature is cooler than the mornings.

If you are looking for that good night's sleep, take a shower only when you are ready to go to bed.

Avoid taking shower immediately after workout since the pores in your skin open out due to sweating (you can observe tiny red dots on your skin). Always allow your body to rest, at least for half an hour, so that the pores close down, and then go for a shower.

Have a warm shower if it is too late at night.


Watch the temperature of the water beforehand.
 Normally, the body accepts temperatures with a difference of maximum 5 degrees. The normal human body temperature is 97 °F (36 °C). Make sure the water is not too hot or too cold.

Taking a shower is a natural way to revitalize the body and mind. You will not only get good sleep, but also stay asleep longer after a shower at night.



Disclaimer: This article is for informative purposes only, and should not be used as a replacement for expert medical advice.

What is unconditional love?

Unconditional love in a relationship begins with oneself. To set the foundation for a lasting, healthy relationship, you must first have a strong sense of self-esteem and self-confidence. This doesn’t mean you never have emotional difficulties or don’t need support and extra attention at times.

But you do need to feel generally good about yourself, to like yourself, and to recognize the positive qualities you bring to a relationship. It also means you can stand on your own two feet as an individual without requiring a romantic partner to define you or complete you. You can be together with someone and still remain fully yourself — as a person you like and respect.

If you need to improve your self-esteem or don’t feel confident in yourself as a capable, valuable person, then your relationship will suffer. Your insecurities will have an impact on your partner and on your mutual happiness. The best thing you can do for your relationship is to learn to love yourself. Offering unconditional love to yourself means you are able to view yourself as lovable and worthy — in spite of any perceived flaws or past mistakes. You can read more about self-love in this post.

Within the relationship itself, unconditional love is the ability to love the other person as they are in their essence. If you have fallen in love with this person and want to build a lasting relationship with them, then you must view them as a unique individual — not as an extension of yourself.

When you find someone who loves you as you are, and you are able to love them as they are,  it is an amazing experience. They may be different from you in many ways. They may view the world differently and have habits that you don’t share, but you can embrace these differences because they are part of this unique person you love.

But is love enough to build a lasting relationship? And does unconditional love mean that no matter what your partner does, your feelings don’t change?

The answer is “no” to both.

Unconditional love within the context of a good relationship is a dance in which both partners participate. You begin with the essentials of self-love and mutual love and respect. You see and embrace the core of the other, their innate personality and worldview. You acknowledge the influences of their upbringing, life experiences, and ingrained behaviors.

But . . . unconditional love within the context of a lasting relationship requires lots of wiggle room. As part of self-love, you know your own personal boundaries and the limits of what you find to be acceptable and healthy behaviors and reactions from your beloved.

 It is your job in the relationship to “use your influence in a caring and disciplined manner to create a balanced exchange with your partner. Such skills are not exercised to ‘control’ or ‘manipulate’ for selfish gain, but rather to maintain a mutually-beneficial and satisfying partnership.”

When both partners are aware of their personal boundaries and are committed to communicating them in loving and non-threatening ways, then the relationship can continue to re calibrate and grow ever stronger over the years.

With the ability to communicate openly, negotiate willingly, and compromise and make adjustments, you can build a strong relationship in which unconditional love develops and grows more satisfying over time.

For both partners, unconditional love means putting the health of the relationship above all else. This is a conscious decision made by both people, and it requires . . .

• regular and open communication;

• active and engaged listening skills;

• a willingness to calmly express concerns or hurts;

• a willingness to make behavior adjustments that don’t compromise your boundaries;

• a willingness to communicate boundaries;

• the ability to accept and even embrace personality differences that don’t compromise the health of the relationship;

• a willingness to continue to work on your own self-awareness and self-esteem;

• complete trust that your partner “has your back” and you have theirs;

• the ability to forgive and forget, especially when forgiveness is requested for flaws and failures and there’s a real effort to make change;

• the firm commitment never to withhold love (or sex or money, etc.) to get what you want or need;

• the desire to express your love with small daily actions and words;

• the decision to let go of the “small stuff” that might bug you so you can focus on the best aspects of your partner;

• the willingness to show extra love and have patience with your partner when they go through periods of difficulty, sadness, or disconnection, knowing it’s a short-lived condition;

• loving the other for the joy of loving, without thought for what you will get in return.

Unconditional love is more intricate and complicated than simply loving your partner “no matter what.” Unconditional love requires stepping back and seeing the bigger picture of your partnership and how to maintain the health of the relationship so that love can continue to thrive and grow.

The first step toward loving your partner unconditionally is learning to love yourself unconditionally. It requires understanding and communicating your own boundaries and limits, yet being flexible enough to adapt and compromise when possible.

And most of all, it requires a daily mutual commitment to maintaining the health of the relationship and nurturing the bonds of love that brought you together in the first place.

Some stupid things that smart people do...

A few of my favorite stupid things smart people tend to do:

• Ignoring the importance of design and style - When the iPod originally came out, technical people complained about its lack of features and perceived high price ("ooh, who cares about another MP 3 player, I can go buy one at Best Buy for $50.  In the meantime, it was so cool and easy to use that normal people went out in droves to buy it.
• Using terrible tools, and taking pride in their awfulness - Especially common with programmers, who take pride in using programming languages and text editors that have been designed by programmers, not updated since the 1970s, and never touched by anyone with a modicum of design sense. They believe that mastering arcane, over complicated commands and processes are a mark of pride, rather than a waste of time.  I will refrain from singling out specific programming languages and tools here, because smart people also like to get caught up in pointless flame wars about this sort of thing.
• Following the pack - Many smart people often seem to be followers, probably because they grow up spending so much time pleasing others via academic and extracurricular achievement that they never figure out what they really like to work on or try anything unique.  Smart people from top schools tend to flock into the same few elite fields, as they try to keep on achieving what other people think they should achieve, rather than figuring out whatever it is they intrinsically want to do.
• Failing to develop social skills - Some smart people focus exclusively on their narrow area of interest and never realize that everything important in life is accomplished through other people.  They never try to improve their social skills, learn to network, or self promote, and often denigrate people who excel in these areas. If you are already a good engineer you are going to get 10x the return on time spent improving how you relate to other people compared to learning the next cool tool.
• Focusing on being right above all else - Many smart people act as if being right trumps all else, and go around bluntly letting people know when they are wrong, as if this will somehow endear others to them.  They also believe that they can change other people's minds through argument and facts, ignoring how emotional and irrational people actually are when it comes to making decisions or adopting beliefs.
• Letting success in one area lead to overconfidence in others - Smart people sometimes think that just because they are expert in their field, they are automatically qualified in areas about which they know nothing.
• Underrating effort and practice - For smart people, many things come easily without much effort.  They're constantly praised for "being smart" whenever they do anything well.  The danger is that they become so reliant on feeling smart and having people praise them, that they avoid doing anything that they're not immediately great at.  They start to believe that if you're not good at something from the beginning, you're destined to always be terrible at it, and the thing isn't worth doing.  These smart people fail to further develop their natural talents and eventually fall behind others who, while less initially talented, weren't as invested in "being smart" and instead spent more time practicing. 
• Engaging in zero sum competitions with other smart people - Many smart people tend to flock to fields which are already saturated with other smart people.  Only a limited number of people can become a top investment banker, law partner, humanities professor, or Jeopardy champion.  Yet smart people let themselves be funneled into these fields and relentlessly compete with each other for limited slots.  They all but ignore other areas where they could be successful, and that are less overrun by super-smart people. Instead of thinking outside the box, smart people often think well within a box, a very competitive box that has been set up by other people and institutions to further someone else's interests at the expense of the smart person.
• Excessively focusing on comparing their achievements with others- Smart people who have been raised in a typical achievement-focused family or school can get anxious about achievement to the point of ridiculousness.  This leads to people earnestly asking questions like: Success: If I haven't succeeded in my mid 20s, could I be successful in the rest of my life? and Are you a failure if you are not a billionaire by age 30? What about 40?
• Ignoring diminishing returns on information - Smart people are often voracious readers and can absorb huge quantities of information on any subject.  They get caught up in reading every last bit of information on subjects that interest them, like investing, life hacking, or tech specs of products they're planning on buying. While some information is useful in making a decision, poring through the vast amount of information available online can be a waste of time.  They end up spending a lot of time gathering information without taking action.
• Elitism - Smart people often use smartness as measure of the entire worth of a person.  They fail to see the value in or even relate with people who are different.

The Lies We Tell Ourselves

People Lie / Common Lies

The most common lies that we tell ourselves:

1. I must have the love and approval of others. I must avoid disapproval at all costs.

2. I must be perfect, a success in all that I do. I must not make any mistakes.

3. People must always do the right thing. When they do not, they must be punished.

4. Things must be the way that I want them to be – otherwise life will be intolerable.

5. My happiness (or unhappiness) is caused by external events. I have no control over my happiness (or unhappiness).

6. I must worry about things that might be dangerous, unpleasant or frightening – otherwise they might happen.

7. I will be happier if I can avoid life’s difficulties, unpleasantness or responsibilities.

8. I am weak and need to depend on those who are stronger than I am.

9. Events in the past have strongly influenced me – and they must continue to do so.

10. I must be upset when others have problems. I must become sad when others are unhappy.

11. I should not have to feel discomfort or pain. I must avoid them at all costs.

12. There is one right and perfect solution to any problem (usually mine). It is a tragedy when it is not found.

Four Destructive and Common Lies

1. I have to make everyone happy.

WRONG! You cannot make everyone happy. Even God cannot make everyone happy – half the people are praying for rain and half are praying for sun.

A GENTLER RESPONSE: Think before you speak or act. Is this in agreement with those things you know to be good, true and beautiful? We cannot achieve a personal or social vicotry in every situation of wrong-doing, but we can have a moral victory by asserting what we know to be true and acting on it.

2. I’ll never find a way out of this.

YET! You found a way into it, and it took a long time.

A GENTLER RESPONSE: With help, you can slowly crawl back out of this. If you take one small step a day and enlist the help of others, you can do this. But you need to start right now. An exercise on goal setting and achieving is available on this website.

3. Why do bad things always happen to me?

UNTRUE! Yes, bad things have happened to you – but you are taking steps to ensure (to the best of your ability) that your “luck” is changing.

A GENTLER RESPONSE: Why do you think bad things shouldn't happen to you? This is the price of admission to the “I’m a human being” club. I grant you that much of what passes for back luck is injustice at some level and that for the poorest of the poor, there may not be cause for hope in their lifetimes. But if you have access to a computer and the time to read this, you are not one of them. And while I don’t wish “bad” on anyone, I do know the bad can be redeemed – can be used to make your own life that that of others, better. 

4. I have a hard time getting along with others.

PARTLY TRUE! The second part, that is. In the first part – except in extreme cases (like torture) – you are overreacting to what other people see as mere a flashing point on the screen.

A GENTLER RESPONSE: People don’t have to adore each other – but they have to be able to interact. A smile and a pleasant voice. It disarms people. None of us is so important that there is a group of people out there who exist to ruin our days.

If, however, it’s only in one situtation this is happening – for example, your workplace – you may be working in a toxic environment. You need to be working on two things: a) your exit strategy – in this case finding a new job; and b) coping strategies – my favorite of which is smiling and sliding through (ie refusing to get stuck in negativity.)

5. I have ZERO energy.

LIKELY TRUE! If you are not eating extremely nutritious food and drinking water, avoiding the anti-nutrients, getting your sleep and lots of walking in... Well, let’s just say, if your body was a car, your mechanic would make his/her next few mortgage payments off of you.

A HELPFUL RESPONSE: All of the above plus the rest of the whole health check in. Remember that every cell in your body is made from the food you eat – or don’t eat. Live like crap, feel like crap. It’s that simple. Plus taking care of your whole health – social, emotional, spiritual, intellectual, and vocational as well as physical – boosts your energy level and immune system.

Overcoming Negative Thinking

You view the world through your predominant mental attitude. If your thoughts are positive, that is fine, but if they are negative, your life and circumstances would probably mirror these thoughts.

If you believe that you are going to fail, you will unconsciously destroy every opportunity to succeed. If you are afraid of meeting new people or having close relationships, you will do everything to avoid people and relationships, and then complain that you are lonely and nobody loves you.

Negative thinking appears to be more prevalent than positive thinking. It seems that with most people, positive thinking requires some effort, whereas, negative thinking comes easily and often uninvited. This has much to do with education and the environment one has been living in.

If you have been brought up in a happy and positive atmosphere, there is more probability that it will be easier for you to think positively. However, If you have been brought up under poor or difficult situations, you will more probably be attracted to negative thinking.

# The power of negative thinking in action:

• Do you often think about difficulties, failure and disasters?

• Do you keep thinking about the negative news see and hear on the TV, or read in the newspapers?

• Do you see yourself stuck and unable to improve your life or your health?

• Do you frequently think that you do not deserve happiness or money, or that it is too difficult to get them?

# Simple Tips to Overcome Negative Thinking:

• Every time you catch yourself thinking a negative thought, replace the thought with a positive one.
• If you catch yourself visualizing failure, visualize success instead.
• If you hear yourself using negative words in your conversation, switch to positive words.
• Instead of saying, "I cannot", say, "I can". Most of the time you can, but choose to say "cannot", due to fear, laziness or lack of self esteem.
• Do you repeat negative words and phrases in your mind? Change them to positive ones. Yes, this requires you to be more alert, and to expend some effort, but you want to change negative thinking into positive thinking, don't you?
• Allow more positive attitude into your life. Have more faith in yourself and expect positive results.
• Decide that from today, from this very moment, you are leaving negative thinking behind you, and starting on the way toward positive thinking and behavior.

How can I compete with myself ?

Say no to dissatisfaction

 Do you wonder why the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence?Most of us are dissatisfied with our lot. It’s human nature. We always find friends, relatives and colleagues, who are richer, better looking and more successful than us. Under-standing that people we envy also suffer from this dissatisfaction, as they find others—better than them—to feel envious of, helps us cope better with our own dissatisfaction. Whether life hands you stuff that you are anxious to get rid of, or you find yourself sitting on life’s sidelines, you are always longing for something more. The dilemma is always the same. How do we push ourselves when we need to move on? What holds us back? Is it the fear of failure? Is it the fear of the unknown? Is it the fear of being unprepared? Is it the fear of making the wrong decision?

 The explanation is within easy reach. We fear failure as one all-important reason: We are afraid of what others will think of us when we fail. Their opinion of us is more important to us than our opinion of ourselves. Self-confidence is a pre-requisite for success. We transfer our unconscious self-appraisal to others and they respond to us accordingly. Perhaps the best introduction to the quest for self-confidence is a look at its extreme opposite—general lack of confidence. It fills you with an all-pervading feeling of inadequacy. It leaves you with a negative approach.

 We feel inferior, guilty, insecure and unloved. Not only big things but also little things put us in the wrong: We trip in an examination, we make a social blunder, and we dress inappropriately for an occasion.” Conscientious, capable men and women everywhere are being held back, are unable to do the best they can—all because they lack self-confidence. Build on your fundamental capabilities. These are the capability to learn, relate, act and re-invent yourself. Confidence comes from preparation. Preparation needs planning and practice. Pressure comes from being unprepared.

The key to harnessing your strength lies in competing only with yourself and not getting affected by others’ performance. High performers focus more intently on bettering their own previous efforts than on beating competitors. In fact, worrying about a competitor’s ability—and possible superiority—can often be self-defeating. Wondering about how other people are doing might discourage you and distract you from the most important task of all— improving your own performance. If you must compete, compete with your own potential. Trying your best and not succeeding is not failure. The real failure is in not even trying or trying but not giving it your best shot.

Feeling lonely!! Here's how to overcome loneliness...

In order to overcome loneliness you need to share your emotions and life experiences with other people.

Try not to spend most of your time alone. If the nature of your work keeps you away from direct contact with people then try to do your best to see people on your weekends.

By going to public places or social events you can increase your chances of meeting people and so reduce your loneliness. The following are some practices you should take to overcome loneliness:

if you study a lot then try to study with someone else. The more time you spend alone the more the loneliness feelings will get reinforced.
If you go for a daily walk, ask a close friend to join you.

one of the very strong factors that help in overcoming loneliness is emotional honesty. Try to be more open with your friends, tell them about your fears and worries instead of running the usual superficial conversations. If you are afraid to share your emotions then you may have a self confidence problem, Some people think that telling others that they feel down or depressed makes them weak. This is not true, you are not your emotions, if you feel down then this doesn’t mean that you are bad and if you are depressed then this doesn’t mean that you are inadequate. It just means that you are a human. Know that normal human beings have down times just like they have up-times. People who claim that they are always superior suffer from an inferiority complex.

one of the most effective ways to overcome loneliness is getting into a relationship. When you get into a relationship each single aspect of your life will be shared with your partner and so the feelings of loneliness will disappear. The draw back to this solution is that you cannot control the time it happens as there are lots of other variables involved. Its pretty beneficial to know how to make someone fall in love with you so that you can use this information to attract others to you.

Another good action that you could take to overcome loneliness is getting involved into some kind of a project that involves team work. When being involved into such projects you will be obligated to share your ideas, thoughts and even your fears with others. You may also have to attend regular meetings in order to discuss the project’s issues. All of the previous actions can totally remove your feelings of loneliness.

One of the main facts about loneliness is that you become more attached to other people when you experience a problem or a downtime. On the other hand you may feel quite normal on your own if you had no current problems in your life and you may even enjoy your time alone, this is called the power of solitude.
Loneliness and depression
Loneliness can result in a severe depression if no actions were taken to solve this problem.

In this case, dealing with loneliness is the only way to get rid of the depression associated with it.


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